Post 403. EVERY CELEB HAS A BOOK IN THEM.

AS A PANDEMIC SIDE-EFFECT.

EXACERBATED BY LOCKDOWN.
Every celeb who has access to a television studio has plunged into published print. All are eager not only to be seen in public again, but to emerge in the unlikely persona of a twenty first century Enid Blyton. Most have written a children's book. At the risk of sounding dismissive, I put that down to their probable assumption that you don't need spell (or even know) too many big words to write a children's book. All you need is a member of a publishing house staff to 'guide' you, the facility to be seen on the box for a few minutes to plug your masterpiece, and you're away.
God bless lockdown.

Now they are lining up for a place on a chat show. Any chat show. And it's not that easy. Unemployed actors, 'resting' entertainers, semi-retired television presenters, and the whole of the inexplicably famous fraternity, must be yearning to corner as many guest appearances on television as does the ubiquitous Ann Widdecombe. Somebody has a good agent.
To date I have read nothing plugged by any of the desperate celebrities on my television screen. If any of them with a 'lovely story for children' ever appears on a chat show I am watching and advertises it with the words: "I read D.W. Barnden's 'The Badgers of Deep Wood' and thought; I could do better than that..." I shall read their book, if only to satisfy myself that they couldn't.

The late Christopher Hitchens once famously commented "Look, everyone has a book inside of them...which is exactly where I think it should, in most cases, remain."
Amen to that.
TO CONCLUDE.

THAT'S ALL FOR THIS MONTH.

My Leader has been weekly shopping and I am standing by to help Ellis unload the car.
Y' don't sit around being a bloody author in this house, mate.

Anyway, they've never heard of me on television.